Unlimited Jargon

British political parties: What they say and what they mean

Below is a quick though not necessarily accurate guide to deciphering what political parties actually stand for. Enjoy!

Liberal Democrats
What they say: We'll protest about anything!"
What they mean: "We won't do anything!"

Labour/socialists:
What they say: "The state needs to be richer"
What they mean: "The workers need to be poorer"

Conservatives:
What they say: "We want change"
What they mean: "We won't change"

BNP:
What they say: "We want Britain to be great"
What they mean: "We want the British to be great"

Respect:
What they say: "We'll challenge Labour"
What they mean: "When our leader isn't in Big Brother we'll criticise Labour"

SNP:
What they say: "We want independence"
What they mean: "Will England still subsidise us if we are independent?"

Green party:
What they say: "We'll protect the planet"
What they mean: "When the other parties destroy the planet we'll be there to tell you we told you so..."

UKIP
What they say: "We'll take Britain out of Europe"
What they mean: "We don't understand the EU"

Labels: Politics

posted by Caesar on Saturday, September 01, 2007